thank-you for responding but the reason why I don't leave is because I own the house it is in my name and this is also our son's home and he would not be able to raise a son on his own especially since I have always been the "main" caregiver...my job enables me to be flexible for my son. I guess what I am saying is it's much to complicated to leave and in spite all that's going on I do love him and I am confused about all this it makes me so sad that it is the way it is. As far as what I meant about a man is I want him to stand up and take control of his own behaviour and treat a women the way she deserves. The term man I used was more of a way to explain...we are in our 40's and are both traditional in the way we were bought up but are here in the changing times of equality between a man & a women.
I do agree with you on the counselling thing I just wish he would agree.