I would bet that your Mother would allow you to always have a pet rather than to be completely alone. With 2 rats & Esther (will always see her name as Easter Bunny...lol), you still have your special pets to care for & that care for you......I think if it came down to the point you might be without any pets before you get "a real job" she would soften.

Sometimes Mom's say extreme comments rather than to get into specific details with all the "what if's".

It is amazing the feelings of animals. I know after I lost my first eskie, both Leo & Destiny were outside when it happened. They were angry at me & I could see they didn't want anything to do with me for a few days. I was hard enough on myself for what happened, so that was really hard. They got over that after a few days, but I didn't.

Glad your ratties have each other.....that helps them get through the missing Allen & the change in their environment until this becomes their norm. I know that animals adapt to the loss better than we do that's for sure. It's ok to grieve as long as you feel it, let it out & don't feel embarrassed about it. Mostly those who have pets understand & know the love you felt & the pain it causes.