I feel like the "monkey in the middle" game. Moosetracks and Traction are throwing the ball back and forth and I'm supposed to want to catch it. I'm not sure if I want to play anymore, though. But I'm not so happy about being talked about, so one more time, then I think it's enough. You two can argue in PM's.

Moosetracks, I've been diagnosed BPD but some of the DPD traits seem to fit too. I'm more dependent than angry. I have an awful time making decisions. I don't think any T could diagnose me so quickly, either. My T doesn't want to diagnose me. She doesn't do therapy that way. I took an online DBT class; I don't know if it helped that much. Bt didn't think the real class would help me, but I don't trust her opinion on that. She wasn't psychodynamically oriented, but behavioral. Everything was about the present and how to reframe negatives and move on with my life. Nice try, but it was only partially successful.

traction, I appreciate your "sticking up for me" but I'd rather speak for myself. I agree with what you said, though. Thanks,

Moose: I see your point too. But I already knew where T lived and I told her during that same session. I agree that seeing her house was crossing a boundary, sort of. I did post that, but know I'm not sure. She said she was scared, but she didn't forbid me from doing it. We only talked about it for about 5 minutes or less. I know she is not going to terminate me for that reason. I don't think she set a boundary. She told me her feelings, that's all.

I know what setting a boundary is because Bt did that. It didn't help at ALL! I was very upset one session and after she left to go upstairs, I sat down in her waiting room to write my check and almost started to cry. I felt so awful that I couldn't leave. I felt glued to the couch. This was her house, but clients could sit there. I stayed because I wanted her to see me crying since I've never cried in therapy. But she didn't come back until her next client was due, and I had stopped by then. I didn't want to leave but I stood by her front door. She told me I had to go, so I did because her next client was there. That night, she called and told me that she couldn't work with me if I crossed that boundary. I understand that, and I never did it again, but she missed the boat with me! She could have spent 5 minutes or even 1, asking me why I couldn't leave, and why I felt like crying, and what could she do to help me? Instead, she just enforced her boundary and I felt devastated. It didn't help me one bit in working on my issues.

So, maybe I DO feel like my needs ARE more important than respecting T's boundary. I've never been able to talk about that in therapy, but now I will. You've given me a lot to think about. I don't need anyone defending me in this thread. Moose has raised some good points. We don't have to defend or argue with one another. I'm okay with this thread. I really am, so I hope everyone else is too.