Thank u4sharing! When I was younger, I was a raver&I used2"candy flip" a lot: taking ecstasy with LSD or ketamine. I was so far gone, but nobody knew because I have never looked like an addict. Even when I was snorting a half oz of "Charlie" a day nobody knew. Drugs were my special little secret. I spent12yrs on drugs, everything from benzos to heroin but never crack cocaine. Drugs were what made me feel "normal"&"alive". I was an expert on what pills did what&almost went2school2b a pharmacy tech so I could learn more bout pills. I began seeking them from the emergency rooms, but after a while they all caught on&I was left with thousands of$$$worht of bills for nothing. I never thought that it was because of my bipolar disorder until I sought help4heroin addiction. Then I learned that I was trying2keep my manically depressed self "stable" instead of just getting therapy4it&taking an antidepressant.
I appreciate ur story. Mines on here but not as detailed as yours. Check it out, its called 4years on methadone&finally starting to taper