You're in therapy yourself, right? So, your therapist can probably help you with this part of it, too--being a good parent, helping your son with whatever environment is best for him. After all, mental illness doesn't occur in isolation; it's part of an entire family system, and for you, your family includes your son. You aren't alone; parenting would be hard with or without ADHD and Asperger's in the picture. Mention the problem to your therapist, and ask whether they might be able to either directly help you, or find a family therapist, child psychologist, or other specialist on family and parenting that you can talk to about making your son's childhood envirnoment the best it can possibly be.

Incidentally, I think perhaps your own diagnoses give you somewhat of an advantage: You know what it's like to be different; it doesn't feel horrible and foreign to you because it's part of your own life. You can understand what it's like to be a little bit on the outside of things, and that's one of the experiences your son will probably be having himself, especially during his teen years. There are a heck of a lot of parents who either go into denial or try to push their kids into a "you-must-be-normal" ideal child mold; and at the very least, you won't be doing that, because you know that being different from others is neither bad nor wrong nor does it make you inferior; and you've already come out and said that you know he's still the same kid you love and always will love, whatever label he has... Some autistics I've talked to have parents who never even got past that point. Believe me, being neurodiverse yourself is an advantage for you.