Wow i found this thread very difficult to read because 1) It was a wall of text and 2) I just didnt understand what you were trying to say .

However, I will try to understand anyway because you deserve some sort of a response. I apologize however if it seems as though I've misunderstood you.

This sort of seems like a word salad, also you might have a delusion or two because of the "effecting births and sports" comment you made. These are signs of schizophrenia. but I could be very very wrong about this.

I dont understand why you have all these rules and fear. You should try to disprove your fears and your rules in order to get better.

That's my 2 cents. =)