YES! yes. That used to happen to me a lot. I would just not be able to think of any other coping skills, other than SI. Even after I learned other skills, and learned why SI isn't helpful, it took me a looong time to be able to think of those skills in the moment when I am in distress. I still forget, sometimes, and that's why I try to have things written down so when I my mind is blank I can just look at my index cards and figure out what to do.

Posting here or on the SI forum helps, too, there are lists of grounding techniques and always someone there to offer a shoulder or a listening ear.

I also have agreed to call my T before I SI, no matter when or where or what's going on. It has been a long, slow process but I haven't SIed for at least a few months (not sure when the last time was) and I don't think about it too much anymore even. It comes up sometimes, like when I'm really freaking out and the emotions seem so huge and I can't think at all, but I haven't even come close to doing it for quite a while. I guess maybe I am starting to heal?