I know what you mean. It makes my jaw drop every time I see how those who are supposed to be the most sensitive (and sensible) can be so inappropriate. I think I'll never get used to it.

A nurse from the mental health center I'm going to said the same thing to me last month. I was really triggered and it still makes me uncomfortable when I think about it, so I understand how upset your wife (and consequently you) must have been. I'm really sorry this happened