I know how you feel! It sucks to miss something that you look forward to, especially if there aren't many things that you enjoy to begin with. I had to miss my support group this week and it is one of the few things I look forward to; I knew logically that it was better to miss it because mentally I was not in a good place, but I still felt ashamed that I couldn't handle a 2 hour group. I guess it's that part of me that still wants to be able to do regular things like regular people (i.e. people who do not suffer from an illness that limits them). I do fully accept that I am just not able to do everything I'd like to do, but there will always be a part of me that wishes I could. Hope that made sense, and sorry for the long post. Anyhow, you're not alone!!