I was being kind of hypocritical because THE ABSOLUTE TRUTH is that I hide things from my T also... She has asked me many times if I have "thoughts" and I always say no and make it seem like it's a light deal... Maybe I was being like that to you because I was kind of yelling at myself lol. I know what it's like man, to feel like you can't say because you don't want to go to the ward! I've never been and I intend to never go, but there have been times I felt like I should admit myself because I'm so out of control. Have you ever gone there? I just feel like if I went I'd be in there with someone who is really messed up, like someone who wants to touch my feet and my hair and stuff. I know not everyone who goes is like that, but I know some are and it scares me to death! You?