I'm so sorry you lost your Dad--twice in a period of several years and after 'finding' him again and reuniting.

You can have regrets without blaiming yourself and feeling guilty. The period of time you didn't see him was the result of his decisions that hurt you. His illness and death doesn't negate that; both are true.
You did what was right for you at the time. What else can anyone do but that.
He left you twice.
There must be a lot of very understandable anger in your grief. You are so angry that you want to erase any traces of him so you don't have to feel that anger. Anger is a big part of grief, and it is okay to feel and to talk about with a therapist or even a group that meets for grief counselling.