Two of the most difficult realities for me: First, to accept there are going to be times I need help. No matter how hard I thought or willed or worked, there are going to be occasions when I cannot get through the malaise without professional help.

Second, to accept no matter how determined I was, I am unable to function at the level I envisioned. To expect less of myself seemed like a heresy. To be told to work hard, save your money and use your God-given talents became useless platitudes when I was so unhappy. I wanted so badly to be very good at something. Instead, I became another small fish in a big bowl. Ultimately I asked why am I doing this?.

These acceptances, however, do not mean I cannot try to function at a higher level. Getting better is hard work. There will be some advances to the rear. Just the same, never quit.