Keith,

I have been diagnosed with Dependent Personality Disorder , and while it is not quite what you describe, there are some similarities. I know all too well that feeling of craving love, but no matter how much you get, it's never enough. Like there's this bottomless pit inside me that I can't fill up, no matter how much I try.

I think for me, one of the keys has been to realize that no one outside of me can ever compensate for the emptiness I feel inside. And that I have to work on learning how to fill my own emotional needs. Sometimes that means consciously dealing with something on my own when my instincts are to find someone else to deal with it for me. And it also involves a lot of self-talk, reassuring myself that I don't need other people's love to prove my existance.

One thing that came to mind when you described feeling emotionally dead was that you talked about chatting girls up and kissing them. I wonder if perhaps what you are craving is an emotional link to someone else, but you are only making a physical link? You might find that if you sought out people to be friends with, and share things with, that might be more satisfying than physical intimacy with someone you hardly know. Do you have any interests or hobbies? Taking a class or joining a club is a way that you can meet people with common interests, who you might be more comfortable sharing real emotions with.

Those are just some thoughts, I don't know if they really fit your situation or not.

Good luck.