I still struggle with with similar issues at times, but I've worked hard to pull myself out of those behaviors. DBT and CBT skills helped me a lot! Here are some links you might find interesting...
http://www.dbt-cbt-workbook.com/The%...d%20States.pdf
http://www.dbt-cbt-workbook.com/DBT-...20for%20DW.pdf
I have the workbook these are from, and I love it! I got mine for about $20 on amazon.com, but here is the link to the website about the book and author: http://www.dbt-cbt-workbook.com/
I'm sorry you're having a hard time; I hope you and your bf are able to work things out!! 
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From the movie The Hours: "If I were thinking clearly, Leonard, I would tell you that I wrestle alone in the dark, in the deep dark, and that only I can know. Only I can understand my condition. You live with the threat, you tell me you live with the threat of my extinction. Leonard, I live with it too."
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