Thank you so much...but I sure don't feel like a wonderful parent. My heart keeps telling me that I should let her back in...but my head screams with bells and whistles knowing that all I'd be doing is enabling her, and that is NOT help.

Although I can't speak for other parents, my guilt is overwhelming sometimes. I continuously replay history wondering if I missed something along the way...or if I did or didn't do something that should have or shouldn't have been done. It's crazy-making in itself sometimes.

I can't tell you how many people always tell me that I can't "save" everyone. Think I would get it?

First it was my husband...and WOW so many things make so much sense now, specifically as I look at our past together...rocky is an understatement, but now I know why.

My own stuff...alcoholic mother, emotionally unavailable father...talk about another train wreck happening in slow motion...

But, I did manage to stop some of those generational issues....yet, something even more heartbreaking still manifested.