At one point I had 14 credit cards with balances on them; I've managed to get that down to 6. This is a major issue with me- especially online shopping, since I don't like to leave the house much. eBay is the devil.

I wear pants to work 5 days a week, and yet I went and bought a closet full of skirts that I never wear. I just had to have them- I told myself that I'll wear them on weekends. Then it turns out I wear one or two of my favorites, and I have six others sitting there with the tags still on for the last 6 months!

I shop because it soothes my mixed states- it cheers me up, yet acts as a sedative to calm the restlessness. I don't purchase big things, but a bunch of inexpensive things until the last cent is gone or my card is maxed out. I tell myself if there's room on the card, then I can afford it. Then, half the time, I feel guilty and end up returning it, or if too much time is passed I have to sell it at a loss. Though I've managed to get a system for paying my cards down, I'm definitely not cured, since I have nothing in savings and live paycheck-to-paycheck. If the money is there, I have to spend it.

It seems that I've always got some vision in my head of something I "need" that will make my life complete. It's like a big hole inside of me that I try to fill with pretty things, but it doesn't work, and as soon as I have that thing, I'm onto a new obsession.

I especially do that with books. Right now I have about 7 books that I've only read a third of. I get on a tangent where I have to have all the information that exists on a particular topic, then I get bored with it before I even finish a book, and I need a new topic. In a way, it's like I'm looking to define who I am by what my interests are, so I keep exploring all different subjects. I do this with clothes, too. One month I'm into lacy skirts, and the next I'm into leather and combat boots. The issue goes way deeper than spending money- that's just the symptom. At the root of it, I really just don't know and/or am uncomfortable with who I am, so I look to material things to define me.

I wish I could tell you how to break the impulse, but I don't know either. You're definitely not alone- it's a common problem with Bipolar.