I think you have hit on something... because I spend a lot of time also wanting to "become the person I would like to be" and trying to move away from "the person that I am." But how can we do it? I mean, on the one hand it's important to want to change, but on the other hand there is a lot of goodness to be had by just accepting who you are, you know?
Hmm.
I know that for most of my life it was not possible for me to get angry. I had no room to get angry as a kid. First, my mom's anger always surpassed mine and anyone else's, and then I was basicallly told that my feelings were not important and did not matter. I couldn't tell my dad about them because he had already left once with the divorce and might leave me behind again.
So now (because of therapy etc) I realize that I had every right to be angry. Anger is such an important emotion, I think. And a good one to take to therapy. I think it is possible to be angry at your parents (or family) and love them as well. It's a way of saying "hold on, something was not right with this situation." I'm hoping that over time this emotion will die down and be replaced with acceptance, inner peace. But for now it feels right to feel this emotion that I have been denied (for various reasons) for so long.

E