Thank you everyone.

I want a career, and the lines of work I wish I could go into all require a continued education. I regret not having continued with my education and I don't want to put it off. It's just a big plunge. I know part of me wants to take that plunge, but on the other hand, I don't know if I have the capability to. If I'm chasing a false dream, if I should just recognize my place in society and accept that I'll never really amount to what I want to be.

I can't go back to hockey, physical reasons. I miss being on a team, knowing that everyone had your back, having a place, being an important cog in a big machine. Needed, I guess.

Thank you for the support and hugs everyone, could do with them and I appreciate it. It's hard not to listen to the bad and agree with it.