Jen,
I understand you are struggling -- I'm so sorry for that. I'll be thinking of you and missing you. Hope taking a break will help you some in understanding self a bit more and to find some inner peace. You're welcome to PM anytime. Be safe and take good care of the special person that you are.
I sometimes need to stand back and recollect my thoughts and feelings. I have found it's helped me.
All the best to you Jen-- missing you already---
Come back when you can!!
mandy