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Jun 12, 2010, 11:03 PM
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Member Since: Apr 2010
Location: East Coast of Florida
Posts: 98
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TatteredandTorn
I'd just like to say how helpful I find this description, I've suffered with my mental health for 11 years now going through many different diagnosis, Chronic Depression, PTSD, Eating Disorders, Sever Depression, Bipolar II and Currently A-Typical Bipolar, Recurrent Depressive Illness, Generalised Anxiety Disorder and Social Phobia...
However I don't honestly think that the A-Typical Bipolar is a correct diagnosis...I have thought for a while that BPD is a better diagnosis...Everything you have described here is me, it's how I Feel, how I act, How I think, How I behave Etc...
I'm at a total loss as I don't know how to tell my Psych and CPN I don't think their diagnosis is correct..
I was a self harmer for years, only stopping because I didn't want to upset my family anymore, but according to my CPN this shows I am stronger than others and that my condition is not as serious, which I'm not saying it is but it's hard, I want to self harm sooo much it's the only way I can feel release/relief and let my anger and frustration out..I don't know how to talk to anyone and I can't be me...I don't know who "me" is...I've lived for so long putting up a front being "ok" and not letting my guard down that I no longer know how I feel, how to cry or anything the only thing I can do is get frustrated and angry..I'm at a complete loss...please does anything think it's possible that if I can say all of this description describes me that I may be right in thinking I have been misdiagnosed? and how can I tell me psych I think he is wrong? Please help I'm at a total loss  I'm terrified of being put in hospital I don't want that at all but I'm scared I will be...please help!
(Ps. I had to remove the link from the quote as it wouldn't let me post with it in!) |
To TatteredandTorn reply to post #43
I too was great at putting up a good front. But if you want to get some relief (you will never be healed of this) you really, really, do need to tell the Dr or show him your post exactly as it is written. Just stuffing down your feeling of self harm does not mean that because you don't do it you are OK. Those thoughts can be dangerous and left untalked about could come to the surface and happen.
Don't worry about your pdoc's feelings. You are paying him. Tell him/her everything and then you can reasses your diagnosis. He can handle being right or wrong. If he can't, move on to another pdoc!!
I hear your pain about not wanting to be hospitalized. If you had pneumonia would you be afraid of being admitted? No. You would probably think that the hosp. is where they can help you. Exactly the same is true with a mental hosp. It is only society that makes that place scary. Where do we get all the scary and inaccurate 'facts' about mental hosp.? From TV and Movies! They are usually not very true, helpful or comforting, and some are right out of the 1940's movies!!!
So please don't let fear and lies scare you from getting the help you need. You will feel better. And YOU ARE WORTH IT!!  Look For The Laughter!! bipolarbearV
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