I agree with Karen, email her, and tell her you're afraid,express yourself as openly and honestly as possible. I'm sure you won't have to rationalize/legitimize your fear in your email. She's the pdoc, so I'm sure she's dealt with this type of reaction before...

Just be honest with her about what you're going through right now, she can only help if she knows something's wrong, and right now she's your only option...

Please suga, take that step... thinking of you!