Quote:
Originally Posted by Rainbowzz
Mandie here, who happens to be (although not that deep into unhygenics) one who also slips into this when very emotionally upset.
I dont think i have ever said this on here,because its embarassing for me. But I will sometimes go days without showering, I cant remember when i last brushed my teeth(oh wait - i do brush them when I throw up, which due to my meds is semi daily - but i dont on any real schedule) and I will wear clothes for days on end, if i dont leave the house.
For me, it comes from two things. One being depression and not caring about myself, and the other is I have semi severe memory issues and I just plain do not remember.
I know the former is true because when I feel special, or good about myself, i clean all up and put makeup on. otherwise, I dont care.
The memory thing is huge. Huge. I need a calendar in every room or else I cant remember the date. I miss everything for the same reasons.
So theres likely ALOT at play here. I am not sure what can be done.  |
Thanks!
And I can't remember the last time I saw her actually smile.. laughing is just about as rare too.. This depression is how she's been since i've known her though.. So.. until it was pointed out here, I hadn't really thought about it.. And perhaps it's normal to her.. maybe it would be normal to me too if I wasn't moved to a psych unit in my pre teen years and had treatment.. yah.. come to think about it.. if I grew up that way.. I wouldn't notice there was a diffrence until something made me feel better for longer than a cowincidental time period.. (that's how it was with the add and the mediciene recently for me.. so I can even put myself in those shoes in a way...)
I don't know why but I feel warm fuzzies and wanna cry because of how helpful you guys/girls are. My other best friend is really helpful too, just we are both getting at the end of our ropes here. And if we know what is wrong, maybe we can understand it better, and deal with things in the way they need to be dealt in. And in that way it's a lot less stressful in both of our cases. Her so were not demanding something above her reach, or going about things in the wrong way, and us so we're not constantly grabbing for more ideas to make things better.
In the end, I know... that the .... well.. I'm happy here.. I am.. but.. the stress and ... constant need to pull, or just sit and stew over it is making me into a negitive person (Which i'm not wanting), and almost even bitter... but with that known about myself I still... she's my best friend... *shakes head* ... she's the only one in my world that is content with being around me all the time... which is something myself longs for.. not a sexual relationship, or anything like that... but.. it's hard to place what i want into words.. (because I don't have any words that are exactly what I am looking for) ... It's like... best friends... sister... and family ... all in one kind of thing.. Best friends, they are there like family.. but not in the.... true family way... if that makes sense... *shrugs* anyways enoughs about me.. I'll go make another topic if I feel like going on about myself. lol
The memory thing is harsh for her father, but she has great memory.. better than mine..(
which i envy a lot).
but.... You know whats Mandie?
Thanks for posting, I know it had to be rough to say that. And It helps knowing that she's not alone
(feels werid for me saying this, but i'm happy that she's not alone in this area - and I also wonder if later down the line when she can come into things with a little bit of an open mind, that she will maybe group up with those who can understand her. I try, but horribly fail to be able to understand exactly what is happening - I mean I can understand certain things, because of my own experiences. but every time i think I have an understanding, she's proven me wrong so I fall back 6 feet below ground.)