I had the worst week. My best friend passed away and put my anxiety level at the worst it's been since my mom died. We were in the Wal-Mart Saturday night and I had a panic attack. The worst one yet. I could'nt breathe and my chest hurt. I just shook and shook. I could not find my husband he was in the video game isle. I felt crazy. And now, my husband said he is'nt going to take me to the county fair this weekend because of my panic attacks because he does'nt want to deal with them. I feel like such a burden. My son really wants to go and so do I but because of my panic attacks my husband won't take us. My son has never been to a fair before. I just want to go somewhere this weekend and my husband is embarrassed and frustrated by my panic disorder. I just feel so stupid. And then my cousin's boyfriend got drunk the weekend before last when she was having a cookout and playing cornhole and ladderball. Well he got up in my face and told me could break both of my legs and he as gonna knock my teeth out all because he thought I was talking to my cousin about her ex. Anyway, I called her Saturday to let her know my phone got knocked out by storms that morning and she said "Hold on" and she put him on the phone with me. I told him I would rather not talk to him to put her back on and so he did. Well we hung up. Then Monday I called her to see if I could ride over and get my CD I left over there and she started cussing me. I guess he told her I cussed him out on the phone Saturday. She told me I have to like him and he was drunk and he was'nt responsable for his actions toward me that night. I told her yes he was responsable for raising his fist at me and threatening me and I could choose whether I wanted to be his friend or not and I choose not to. That made her even madder and she started cussing and screaming I could'nt understand half of what she was saying. Then she hung up. Well the way I see it, if she don't know why I refuse to put myself around him then she don't know me at all and she is'nt who I thought she was. All of this is just too much. I can't go anywhere because my husband won't take me because of my panic attacks. The only person I trust is dead. My cousin hates me because I don't like her boyfriend. I swear does it ever end? I can't deal with all of these people. I think I'm going to just leave. Move away from all of this stupidity.