Berries......I'll validate how you're feeling because I'm feeling pretty much the same. I too wish that I had words, for both of us, but I don't. I just do understand much of what you have posted. My life has been turned upsidedown with my Bipolar 1 diagnosis, but even before that, no matter how I looked on the outside, inside I've been unhappy. I was working at a job I loved, front desk at a health club.....but all it really did deep down was point out to me how many issues exist in my life, how different my life was from most of theirs'. Just the furthest thing from what I thought to be "normal". But then, everyone would say "what's normal, anyway?" At least, know you're not alone......