I just wrote this whole great post & it logged me out for inactivity & it got deleted. The second time around is never as good

Its hard for me to get over, I'm really mad about it

I am always making impulsive decisions I regret later. It can be as simple as an email or as serious as moving to another state.

I'll send an email & I think I totally am on the right track. I've got it. Like I sent an email to my HR department today complaining about our insurance. But I regret it only moments later, thinking I'm coming across to strong or complaining too much.

I moved to Washington from Southern California in 2005. I had a great job just streets away from my Santa Monica apartment. My Dad died, my Dad was my parent. I grew up with him not my Mom. I was separated from my 2 sibilings & chose to live with my Dad at 11 years old. My Dad was bipolar too, but he didn't know it. He never got treatment its only as an adult I can look back at him & see many signs. This was & still is the only person I've known to die. I knew a man here in WA that I liked & he was there for me after my Dad's death. I fell in love with him & moved here. A house & a baby later, I want to move home. I can't live in a constant state of winter especially with bipolar.

I don't know how to be content. I thought I was unhappy in LA but now I look back & I'm like OMG I Was so happy. Now I'm here & I'm unhappy but I'm even afraid if I got my way & we move to LA what if I am unhappy any way? I don't trust myself. I don't know what I want & my relationship is suffering. Were looking into counseling but I wanted to see what you all have to say about impulsive decisions & regret.