I completely understand. I'm in the process of trying to face the fact that I was rapped multiple times at age 13-15. I'm 46 now and repressed it until 2005. Total denial for the past 5 years, therapy, meds., mental hosp., PTSD, anxiety and depression. No sex life either. I have a wonderful husband who was "there" for me, night terrors, isolation, fear, crying, ANGER, all the effects that we all have. I know I'll get beck to a bettter life envetually, now that I'm on the right track, but it's going to take time and patience for both of us. You're not alone. Keep talking and facing your fear. How are you after sex and the anxiety attack. Are you proud that you worked through it or do you stop? I face my fear, cry, cuddle, them when I calm down and feel safe, I able to continue. Sorry for the TMI. I know you understand. It's a day-by-day, baby steps. Be kind and gentle to your self. Your fiance understands and knows that you both will get through this. That's my hope.

Best of luck.