Kunderwood - you and your husband are really an inspiration. The effort you are both putting in is heartwarming. I'm sure it must have felt terrible when you were first dx'd, and to have your husband dx'd a few days later... I cannot imagine what you are going through.
I also truely hope that your husband's abuse is only due to BP left untreated. I too can get very physical when I get angry, but I try direct it at a wall or anything else other than a human. I am still working on my med combo and hope this physical anger will lessen with time
Please look after yourself, being in a somewhat abusive relationship. I really do understand. Don't make excuses for him or his behaviour. Give him a fair chance to improve now that he's on medication, but don't allow the wool to be pulled over your eyes with regards to why he is abusive. He is seeking help and I'm sure an improvement will be inevitable

((HUGS))