That does seem strange, my family is the complete opposite, I definitely know the answer to the bad relationships. My grandfather is an alcoholic and has a temper, he has that attitude where he knows he's right and if you don't do what he says he'll get angry. And my grandmother is the keep quiet and deal with it and don't stand up for yourself kind of person. So from that, even though my grandparents are still together, there have yet to be any successful relationships in my family and every female in my family has been with abusive men. I mean I literally have no positive relationship to go by, which is why I am still single.
It frustrates me that everyone caves in to my grandfather, but I seem to be the only one that doesn't, I have a reputation for being the one that's going to say it, everyone else can't deal with me speaking up.
His attitude is hurtful and when it comes to my father it's also confusing. Once I was in the car with my grandparents leaving my auntie's house, and I asked if we could stop at my dads to say hello because he literally lived around the corner, about 20 seconds away. My grandfather refused and got in a big huff, and I ended up jumping out of the car as my grandfather stopped to turn the corner and caught the bus home in tears. I don't understand why my grandfather is like that. I just wanted to say hello to my father. He has cancer (although I don't know how that is going because I haven't seen him in a long time), and I don't think that even wavers his judgment one bit. I've asked him what his problem is before and he said it's because I always fight with my dad. All I want to say to him is that at least my father didn't beat me up when I was 15.

Having said all of that, my father scares me. He is a tough guy (although I do find him weaker than he'll ever admit to), and he is also a boxer. He uses this tough exterior as his defense, he gets angry at the drop of a hat, he calls me things like stubborn and a drama queen (which are names one of my abusers used to always call me so it gives me all the more reason to believe it), he has sent me horrible messages in the middle of the night, he pushes me into things I don't want to do, like when he tried to make me take self defense classes from one of his mates. He downplays anything that has happened to me because he's 'older than me and had more experience, and I don't know what it's like to go through this and this and this'. He tries to make me look as though I'm trying to be tougher than I am, if I say I know how to defend myself, if I say I've lived on my own since I was 17 and I'm in my 20's now so I think I can manage, he's just laugh at me.

Plus there's the fact he drinks and does weed. In fact when I called to tell him who I was for the first time his girlfriend thought I was calling to buy drugs.
My father does try, but he is so damn clueless. So when I want him to back off he gets defensive and angry.

So it's a very difficult thing for me. I have been told by so many people that I should just forget him, but he's the only god damn father I have, wanker or not. And it's not like he's any worse than any of the others.
It's like I kind of do want to see him sometimes, but I block that out. I am too scared to go there on my own. Anger is a trigger for me so when he gets mad I cry and then he lays into me about that and treats me like I'm weak.

He frustrates the hell out of me. But then I have met plenty worse.