Welcome to the Community, bobbi416.

The Depression Forum is here: http://forums.psychcentral.com/forumdisplay.php?f=6
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/dep...5/METHOD=print

The Dissociative Disorders Forum is here: http://forums.psychcentral.com/forumdisplay.php?f=30
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/dis...4/METHOD=print

The Survivors of Abuse Forum is here: http://forums.psychcentral.com/forumdisplay.php?f=14
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/chi...9/METHOD=print
http://www.way2hope.org/domestic_violence_facts.htm

The Chronic Pain Support Forum is here: http://forums.psychcentral.com/forumdisplay.php?f=36
http://www.wellcome.ac.uk/en/pain/mi...medicine3.html
http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/c...ronic_pain.htm

The Steps to Better Self-Esteem Forum is here: http://forums.psychcentral.com/forumdisplay.php?f=34
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/sel...9/METHOD=print
http://cmhc.utexas.edu/booklets/selfesteem/selfest.html
http://www.helpguide.org/mental/ment...nal_health.htm

You have been through a lot, bobbi416. Is obtaining professional help an option? Takes courage to do what you are doing. I wish you the best.