I don't really know. I guess knowing who I am without having a label such as wife or mother attatched to it. All i know is I feel empty and so sad when nothing is going on - everything I hear is the words I was told when I was growing up - and I guess that is how I felt about myself unless someone else identifies me as something else. Although I think I stink as a mom and wife, but at least it is not so lonely. I guess it is really confusing - I'm confusing myself just writing it!!!