These responses, all of them, are amazing. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I feel that I am slipping away.....a bit more each day. I cannot believe that I will emerge from this but your posts are giving me something to cling to. I am losing my ability to take routine care of myself, to do anything at all around the house, to go out, everything. I'm terrified that my husband will break down. My sister is a voice on the phone. You are strong, determined people and more than anything I want to follow in your footsteps. My pdoc "joked " yesterday, saying that this wasn't a death sentence......like pancreatic cancer or whatever......but he is light years away from comprehending what a Bipolar 1 diagnosis can do to you. I know that the severity of my situation is extreme......but I will keep returning here to PC to give and get support......thank you and hugs to all of you......greylove