HP,

Do you have a history of alcoholics in your life? I believe that you said you are using the affair as an escape from reality. What are you going to do after this affair runs its course? Do you think you will seek out another man?

You said you feel sorry for your husband and his current condition, and that is why you stay with him. Is this the truth or is it because he is a "safety net" if this affair doesn't work out. I know you mentioned finances, but others have made it on less.

Have you shared with your husband how you feel? have you given him the chance to meet your needs, provided they are realistic? My thing is this. If you have, and he hasn't changed then why live a lie? is getting a roommate a possibility?

If you could wake up tomorrow and have the life you wanted, what would it look like?