Its usually rare to find only one person in a co-dependent relationship. You are both probably co-dependent in your own ways. There is a great book; Codependent no more, that you should read. Codependency and control go hand in hand.

Do you love your boyfriend? you can make it. Assure him that your feelings are yours to own and its not his responsibility to manage your feelings. I would say this to him every time he internalizes them, and you will probably say this to him a lot. He should seek some help for this as well.

Have you considered couples therapy? if nothing else, read that book, seriously.