Thank you all for the messages, the hugs and the prayers. You are "anchoring" me and I am returning to PC often to get (and hopefully give!) support.

WendyAussie......I can see you understand exactly what I'm going through and have been through once before. Not even the remotest thought that you are being too forward. You have given me incredibly thoughtful and caring posts. I am watching myself very closely and do know what you're saying.......to get myself a "greater level of care" is definitely not beyond the realm of possibility. I cannot let myself go to the bad place again......

Hugs and love to all of you,
greylove