Hi TB,

You know assertiveness doesn't involve being a jerk, it's being able to let others know how you feel and what type of behavior you will accept for yourself.

I doubt highly that your an alcoholic, you do need to find better ways to cope with your problems. I also wanted to say, dont let your boyfriend be the barometer of your worth.

You are a valuable person, with him and without him. If he is unhappy ask him why. The byzantine was right, communication is key. Learning how to really listen to someone else is difficult, but well worth the effort.

Good luck.