((((((((((ickydog)))))))))))))) You are no such thing as a waste of space or worthless. I am proud of you and your accomplishments for what it is worth. I wish you could see your achievements as well as I can. Sometimes people get complacent when someone does well and forget that you need to hear how proud they are too. Maybe you could find the courage to ask them what they think of your academic accomplishments. You may be surprised at what you hear. Please bask in the rewards of your hard work. Don't let anyone take that away from you. Take care and I am glad you are attempting to not let your disappointment trigger you into SI. Be safe.