You are not alone, I also feel terrible about what I put my daughter through, it's terrible, the guilt, the self-loathing and the feeling of inadequacy...
But remember this: You are worth the effort, you are worth the fight, you are worth the energy, YOU ARE WORTH IT
and you're right...it will pass, you have to have faith...
I'm here for you, we (your PC family) are here for you

Keep posting, and we will do our best to support, encourage, motivate and understand... Mwah