Oh, doctors. with their silly white coats that make people assume they're angels...
Anyway, why do you hate yourself and your life? I feel the same way, but surely their must be something good.. possibly. Why do you hate yourself? I think you're a great person although I've never met you. You're a caring person with a bunch of crappy people that are just standing in your way! Remember people really do care about you, I do
Keep on going. ( I'm not good at giving advice, so forgive me if I didn't help you at all )