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I honestly think that women should be ok enough not to have an emotionally or physically violent reaction to their husband looking at a woman. If they don't like it fair enough deal with it as soon as possible, don't stew on it.
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With much respect Rhiannonsmoon, I don't understand where you got the notion that anyone had a physical violent reaction about this?
yes -emotional-- but emotions are not bad. If something doesn't feel good then it is best to talk about it... which I did, and my husband totally understood where I was coming from
and so he doesn't partake in such.(immature actions- IMO) He respects me in that way, and I inturn respect him in that way as well..... it's equal.
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Your indication was that you will not tolerate roving eyes". This is either an insecurity or a controlism.
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You seem to think that "roving" is a man's need... I dont' believe that. I never control anyone when it comes to needs. It's NOT insecurity when a woman wants respect... I understand that this world is NOT used to that-- it is usually just accepted that men be that way.
I believe in respect and this is where I draw the line and like I said, my husband totally agrees. He thinks it's disrespectful how a lot of men, when married, will look at other women. He agrees with me-- I am not controlling him. Maybe it's just too alien of thinking for you to understand that it can be that way in a relationship-- where the man is not a rover. He respects me and my feelings. And he's very manly
He is a marksman, he loves to fish/camp, play golf and brews beer.
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I do agree that there is a line that should not be crossed and I think turning around to get a better look, or trying to get her to look them in the eye so they can send a visual sexual message is wrong and should be discussed.
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that is what YOU will/won't tolerate-- that is not me.
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I just think it would be much more peaceful for the woman who dislikes this behaviour to come to a peace rather than blow her stack.
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come to peace, as you say-- means to swallow that horse pill and live with discontent...
I don't believe that way.
I will not.
I don't have to-- instead I can find a man that will respect my feelings-- and I have. Women don't HAVE to swallow that horse pill, like society tries to make them think they do.
One is not necessarily "insecure" or "controlling"- when seeking respect.
And for the record-- I never "blew my stack" at my husband. We conversed and I told him how it feels and asked him how he'd feel if the tables were turned and he said he wouldn't like it, it would feel disrespectful... so that's that... he understood me.
I'm glad you're comfortable with the way things are in your relationship... that's what's important. I just wanted to let shewhoissweet know that if it feels like swallowing a horse pill then maybe things feel out of balance to her and that there is an alternative for her..... there is more than one way to deal with this situation.
respect to all
fins