Lamictal is my miracle drug.

My fiance is very blunt and he's adjusting to living with an extremely sensitive personality while I'm working on being less sensitive. We can't even have a serious talk without me bursting into tears. So he feels like he's walking on eggshells and can't tell me how he really feels because I'm either going to cry for an hour and repeat how much he hurt my feelings, or I'm going to lash out at him in anger to try and hurt him right back.

I'm at the point where I recognize it happening WHILE it's happening, but not at the point where I've learned some coping skills. So I know what I'm doing, but I can't help myself. Hopefully that will come with time. Meanwhile, after the fact I look back at what happened and think, how could I go from perfectly happy to completely despondent and self-pitying in literally an instant? Honestly I live in fear that he'll finally give up and leave me. And I couldn't say I blame him, cuz I'm crazy.

Living with bipolar isn't easy. Living with someone with bipolar is just as hard.

PLEASE don't blame this all on yourself. This is not a life you chose to lead. Some people are just not strong enough, not like you and I, who are learning to live with it, as hard as it often is. There are very few people who can cope with living with bipolar, whether it's their own or a loved one's. Most important right now is taking care of yourself.

There are support groups, group therapy, millions of people who have mental disorders available online (like here!)... and we're all happy to talk to you. These message boards are a lifesaver for me, I think, sometimes literally. Always here if you want to talk!

--RK