Well, I've got to be honest. There are two specific parts to your post that send off warning bells in my head.The first being:
" I can't help it that I can hold my liquour."
This means that you have a tolerance to liquor. And tolerance IS the first step to addiction.
"Honestly, I've been through a lot and I have reasons to drink.. most of the time"
Drinking to cope with problems or things you have been through is almost always the first sign of addiction too.
If you are drinking in any way but for taste(say, you enjoy wine) or socially(at a bar, with friends) thats a good time to evaluate where you are with your drinking.
Make no mistake, drinking to deal with your past or cope with feelings, or etc, is in fact, alchohol ABUSE. Not to mention that it doesnt help - you just wake up the next day feeling worse than you started off feeling, then you have another drink to cope with the hangover. Suddenly you find yourself shaking without a drink in the mornings.
Also, this struck me as particularly poignant:
"I know that drinking at 6am (gas stations start selling alcohol at this time) isn't necessarily a good thing but I don't do that every single morning. I feel like I'm in control."
You say that you don't do this every morning - how often would you say you do this? Would you say, 3 times a week, once a week, once a month, a couple times a year or even less?
If its any more than once a month or so, I think I would be questioning very highly. I cant tell you if you are addicted, only you can decide that, im just showing you what I see from the post and how IME it usually shows addicting behaviors.
Couple more Q's for you. How MUCH do you drink in a session? How often do you have drinking sessions? What causes you to want to drink at 6am? Is your drinking the type where you have one or two glasses of wine, and thats it - or do you sit down and drink a quart each time?(or any other large amount).
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