Hello,

It would seem you are still struggling with your toxic shame and have difficulty setting boundries with people. Do you feel like you are not worthy of this? Why do you feel the need to people please? Is it low self-esteem? From what I read you lie a lot because you cant set boundries or allow yourself to say "no".

I hope you are in counseling to work on your shame and self-esteem. It would seem you have some very negative "tapes" playing in your head and your behavior is reflecting the message they are playing.

I too used to want everyone to like me, and I went out of my way to please everyone. I would say yes when I wanted to say no, and then be pissed at myself later for not saying how I felt.

Please take care of yourself and find a qualified T who can help you with this. If you dont you will have a life of misery and destroyed relationships. Let me know how you are doing.