So. Haven't been able to sleep at night since getting discharged from the hospital. So basically a week ago today. I freak out and become a sobbing mess actually. On top of being unable to sleep in certain positions because either my shunt/head hurts, or I freak out since that's the way I had my head positioned for ninety billion procedures. I can sleep during the DAY but not at night. Which does pose a problem...

Talked to two counsellors and my psychiatrist. Having phantom pains, freaking out for no good reason. Jumpy. I keep imagining needles... it scares me.

I never knew that you could have "traumatic stress" without the PTSD label affixed (since one of the requirements of THAT diagnosis is symptoms lasting 6+ months. If this happens for that long, I'll go nutso).

So. I now want to go back to the neuroscience unit at the hospital and tell them that they're HORRIBLE because people should not be admitted for 48 hours and leave as emotionally messed up as I am. AND I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE SURGERY. I know I wasn't emotionally totally sound coming IN, but this is ridiculous.

:cries: :curls up in a ball:

But it is 2am, and I'm awake. Still. Going to try to tire myself out, maybe get to sleep before 3am if I'm lucky.