I tried to convince myself once I was better off w/o the meds, and it was a recipe for disaster for me. I am better off with them than with out. If they help me to function and make life worth living, they are worth it to me.

It can be difficult finding the right T but not having one makes things more difficult in my world. It took a bit of patience and a couple of interviews, but I found a gem. If the one you liked isn't available, as Sugahorse mentions, ask docs, nurses, or other patients you might come across who they like and would recommend as a starting place.

Hang in there. It's important to have help and support in managing BP. You deserve it.