So sorry, this job thing didn't work out.
Please, try to look at it this way, it may help a little, the job probably sucked, and it may be to your advantage it fell through. An old saying, but true, "where one door closes another one opens".
Perhaps, this gives you more time, and the right job for you is waiting for you, this may have actually given you a better opportunity.
I know, this "flip flop" thinking thing, doesn't always work, but it may help. I am wishing that soon you your opportunity will arrive. Meanwhile, try to be kind to yourself, we care about you, and know that awful feeling(s) you may have at the present. Always feel free to talk to us, or even PM.
Sincerely,
DE

((((((((((( NF ))))))))))))))))