Hi, WarriorPrincess, welcome to PsychCentral (PC).

I think there's a lot you can probably do with yourself that might help the relationship, before you try to tackle your husband and his problems? Were I you, I would work on my self esteem; it's wholly about ourselves, not others, what we think of ourselves. Doesn't matter what someone else calls you or does around or "to" you; how well you know and get along with yourself is 100% your responsibility. If you don't like and respect you, how can someone else?

I would try some counseling and learn some ways to help yourself so you don't need as much "help" from your partner.