I'm quite sure this is not in the right forum but I'm not sure there is a right forum for my question and ultimately, it is about relationships and about communications and this is certainly a place where people in relationships come. So here it is:

How do you give support or advice to someone regarding love based questions when their definition is different from yours?

PC is about support and really, I want to be supportive but I find that I'm not very good at it - or at least I am not as good at it as I would like and I want to get better. I do not, however, want to get better at being supportive so much that I am willing to lie or blow smoke.

When someone comes on and says, "I need some advice. I love my husband totally and unconditionally with all my heart but he has this little mole on his left pinkie toe and it's kind of grossing me out. Should I leave him?" I have no idea what to say. And I know, some of you are thinking - that's ridiculous but I've seen stuff on here that seems just as ridiculous, at least to me.

I mean, she obviously thinks she's in love with him and they're compatible on some level or they wouldn't have gotten together in the first place so there's a very good chance that their emotional maturity is in the same zip code... I mean, if somehow I ever found myself with a woman like that and she told me that I'd be like, "Yeah, no you should absolutely leave me. I understand completely, have a nice life." but maybe they're meant for each other. I mean, maybe he's asking his friends if he should leave her cause she put on 12 pounds or is only a C cup.

Yes, I know I can keep quiet and move on to another post - that is not the point, I would like to learn how I can be helpful to those people whose posts I find myself avoiding now. I've seen some posters do it and am mightily impressed but despite seeing how the answer might be right for the original poster, like a math problem where they just put the answer and didn't show their work, I find it hard to duplicate. How do you do it?