Thread: I am a cutter.
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Old Jul 04, 2010, 09:30 AM
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sixelalost sixelalost is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2010
Location: Virginia, USA
Posts: 5
Always have been, always will be. I haven't done it in a few months but no matter how long I go without cutting it will always be a part of me. The worst thing about it is that everyone I know knows it. Even new acquaintances know because of these hideous scars on my arm. Actually, the true worst thing about it is that I don't do it anymore. For four years I cut myself continuously. I wore a jacket everyday because I had low self confidence and felt naked without it, which turned out to be a good thing once I started cutting because I could hide it. I eventually stopped wearing jackets and needed somewhere else to cut out of plain view. I started cutting on my upper thigh and on more than one occasion I would cut on my chest or breasts. I started biting myself when I would get upset because it hurt like I wanted it to and just left a bruise as opposed to a life long scar. I stopped cutting myself because my friends talked with me and helped me through things, but the urge to hurt myself always seems to arise. I am writing this because I need help. I need a reason to stop hurting myself and I cannot find one.
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Sixela Lost -

"Sometimes I feel like there's a hole inside of me, an emptiness that at times seems to burn. I think if you lifted my heart to your ear, you could probably hear the ocean. The moon tonight, there's a circle around it. Sign of trouble not far behind. I have this dream of being whole. Of not going to sleep each night, wanting. But still sometimes, when the wind is warm or the crickets sing... I dream of a love that even time will lie down and be still for. I just want someone to love me. I want to be seen. I don't know. Maybe I had my happiness. I don't want to believe it but, there is no man. Only that moon."

Last edited by Christina86; Jul 04, 2010 at 07:36 PM. Reason: added trigger icon