Ms Futz,

You have a loving, caring and supportive personality. I'd like to focus on that and let you know that sometimes just because we have a mental illness it doesn't mean we are the one to stuff up.

It's obvious you love your niece and it's just as obvious you would love to be there at her wedding to see her wed. I ask you though to look at what happened in the first in-stance to make her react and subsequently act the way she has.

Not knowing what was said I can't really allude to that but I can allude to the fact that you in a round about way called yourself dumb for making a manic comment or joke. You are not dumb so please don't think you are. What that says to me after reading your post is that you would rather consider yourself or your comment dumb rather than accept that your niece was wrong in her reaction without even discussing the situation with you. I personally don't agree with you in that regard; hurting and punishing yourself will not change your nieces atittude.

Since the year . families have embarrassed, humilliated, and made cringe the next generation of their own blood; there's nothing whatsoever that would stop them from being embarrassed because they haven't told you in advance "hey auntie there are supreme court judges here tonight pllleeeaasseee don't make any jokes or scenes or anything like that, I've already given the heads up to the others".

I just want you to know that you are a wonderful person who always has a kind word for everyone, who doesn't judge anyone, who doesn't hurt anyone and who goes out of their way to make others feel less panicked and less afraid of their mental illness.

For me personally you have said just the right words that have stopped me from being completely engulfed in blackness by making me think about what I had written and turning it around to accept responsibility for my condition and for working on it to bring me further along the road.

I am sad for your niece, for not having you in her life she is missing out on a very loving woman who is fighting the fight of her life to maintain as even a keel as she can; your niece unfortunately is into "appearances" not "family first",

I think you are wonderful, brave, strong, loving and a great example here of what it is to handle things as best possible,

Loving thoughts,

Rhian