Adding to Fresia's "what are the facts", one thing I've learned about self-confidence is not to bother getting my Self mixed up and dependent on facts. Face shape is face shape. There's no point in arguing with or feeling good/bad about your face shape because it's like arguing with a rock; you can't win? I think when we pick on our bodies, it's because we're really worried about something less concrete and that can be scary.

For example, if a lot of people are telling me to smile, I might think they are criticizing me and instead of looking at that, I'll decide that my face/smile is the problem (something I can't change, or at least not consciously), not how well/often I smile and/or whether others are criticizing me. I transfer my fears others don't like "me" to identifying with my face, which I can't change, but which is also not "my fault".

I'm not saying a good haircut can't make us feel better, prettier, etc. internally, but it doesn't really fix any problems; the hair will grow/have bad hair days, and our self-esteem will plummet and that's the problem; our self esteem doesn't have anything to do with the outside world, it's all about how we feel about ourselves.

I suspect, Like Your Spell, that your mother or father or siblings, classmates, etc. called you "stupid" too often growing up and you have never looked at it very hard as an older person to think about how you actually are, when you feel stupid and "why" and then judge the event/reason rather than yourself?

One of my orienting phrases for my self esteem is, "I'm the right size, it's the pants that don't fit." We get so use to thinking when a machine/computer breaks that it's an "operator error" and never realize the machine is supposed to work for us, not us for it. If I can't operate the machine, it's because the idiot programmers did a lousy job! Students get a bad rap for being lazy or "stupid", etc. but if you have a room full of college students, all "failing" a course, you can bet it's the teaching that isn't very good, not the students!

Next time you feel "stupid" for something you've said, immediately stop and look at the situation. What did you say/when did you start to "feel" stupid. What is "stupid"? Is it embarrassment? For what? Did you not know or understand something, get the joke "late"? Why is it important to get the joke when everyone else or the majority does? We all have our own backgrounds and bunch of stuff/references we carry around and maybe I have "more" good stuff, a richer life, and it takes me longer to search through it for the right reference than it does you through your stuff

Think about the word "stupid" and how inexact it is? When we're giving ourselves a hard time, notice the words we use; they're stupid! It's like saying a person is "nice". What does that mean? Criticisms, especially self-criticisms don't use very interesting, exact, colorful words/language. Just, out of the blue, decide that you will only accept colorful criticisms from now on. It will make you laugh the next time you call yourself "stupid" and you'll "reply", "Nice try, but that isn't good enough!"